Wednesday, October 7, 2015

What heaven looks like..

HI everyone! It's been over a year and I have SO much to say!! Like SO much!! But this post may be one of the best. 

I am a FIRM believer in not pretending that life is perfect on social media because .. Plot twist it's not! However I also am AGAINST people's negative dirty laundry. So here's to a happy medium!! 

Lately I have been In a bit of a slump. The seasonal stuff always happens to get me down. It's dumb. Seriously. Why does that happen? Because I LOVE this time of year.! 

For the past little while I have felt like I have had a little bit of a disconnect from my Heavenly Father. Only in the sense of I KNOW I NEED to do more on my part to grow a stronger relationship with him and that is SO very important to me. So, it's very discouraging when I feel like I am not doing all that I can. 

So.. This week has been a GAME. CHANGER. I love being a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and knowing just the steps I need to take to get back on track! 


Let's start with a back story. Anyone who knows me knows I LOVE to serve people. And I LOVE to help babysit and watch kids . I love to serve and love all that I can. It's just who I am . Well the past few weeks I have had a couple different instances of being taken advantage of and people don't even recognize how much I really try to do for them and then turn around and seem to just brush me off. I found myself bawling in a corner many times last week...

Next off, Luke has been having to travel a lot for work lately and we both HATE it. We miss each other a ton and it's stressful for my Luke. Well, this week last minute, we found out yet again he will be going out of town. This made us both pretty bummed. Yesterday I was feeling very sad about that when.... I received some information.

So I'll do a separate post about this but my best friend Chloe and her husband Taylor welcomed their son into the world 14 weeks prematurely . (This was back in July). Many miracles have occurred and their little Cooper is a champion! Holy cow that little guy is a fighter. Well, he has come very far but, premature babies are at risk for a lot of different medical complications. Coop has overcome many of these things! ( like I said miracle fighter babe) but some things are inevitable..  Yesterday Coop had an MRI and it showed he had some damaged brain matter from an early hemorrhage when he was first born. It hadn't healed quite as hoped, and he is at risk for Cerebral Palsy and a few other developmental set backs. This devastated my sweet friends Chloe and Taylor yet again, and that devastated me. I have learned just how much these people mean to me over the past 14 weeks especially and I HATE watching my Chloe girl's mama heart brake.. Yet again. So, thus came the tears again. Yesterday tears streamed down my face for a solid hour. I couldn't stop. We are ALL so thankful for how far he has come but, you just never want your baby or in my case my best friend and her baby to have any problems or pain. I mostly started crying when I knew how hard it was for Chloe. But her being her continues to have amazing faith and told me " we will just take things one day at a time." (she is an angel)

Whelp, about fifteen minutes after I heard about Coop's MRI, my Cystic Fibrosis clinic called and informed me my insurance (who by the way is very stingy on who they approve) approve me for a new miracle drug called Orkambi. it is as close to a cure as they have for Cystic Fibrosis. My heart filled with excitement. I work SO hard to keep myself healthy, and I can not wait to live a longer life!! Now, there are many risks and side effects with this new med often leading people to become very sick before they feel better ( it is LITERALLY changing the cell function in your body) so you can imagine a little push back and retaliation from those suckers !! Lol. 

Anyways, right before I heard from Chloe and about the new medicine I had knelt in prayer. I was feeling very guilty for being a baby about my husband going out of town I thought.. Umm Mindy.. There are people whose husbands are in Iraq or go out of town EVERY week for much longer periods at a time.. So I prayed to GOD and apologized  and I quickly was brought back to reality... Obviously... When Chloe texted me about coopers MRI I thought.. Here I am being a baby complaining about these silly things when my friend has been in the NICU with a baby fighting for his like for almost 90 days!! Reality check Mindy ... You are fine.. 

Continuing on... Today I got to go on a fly out for my job which I will post more about what I do for a living later but, basically I am on an organ procurement team! (Aka we go and get the organs for people on the transplant list) this results in us being there for the very end of life for many people. In reality we do this is because others are SO sick that they are facing death at any given moment.. Living a life where they are so very sick they can barely function. 

We do procurements for every age.. from ages 6 months to even 70 years old.. These people have all had different amounts of time to be on this earth and every time I so a procurement I realize just how fragile life is. As I was flying to another state today, we were up in the air and I gazed out the window and stared at the beauty of the earth and the clouds and thought.. This has got to be close to what heaven looks like. I was so thankful for the beauty I was able to see and feel.. And all these lessons helped me draw closer to GOD and see his hand in my life.. The lessons are these.. 
(This is exactly what I was looking at when I was flying. Isn't it beautiful?)

1 I am very fortunate to have the life I do.

2 Luke has a job... We have a house and everything we could ever need.. Other people have it so much for difficult so even thought we spend some time a part for travel we are SO blessed to both have jobs 

3. People matter.! Remember all those around you are fighting a battle. It may be different from yours but guess what? They are still fighting. Whether it's a baby in the NICU, depression, the loss of a loved one, and much more.. Be kind, be selfless. We need to bear one another's burdens. They help us realize how truly amazing the people in our lives are and the strengths they bestow as individuals.

4. Most people have had a lot of push back from their insurance companies for this new drug. Almost everyone I know has had to make an appeal, and for some miracle I didn't have to. I'll be starting in the next couple of weeks here so more info will follow.

5. I am loved more than I think I am.. I am SO hard on myself most of you wouldn't know this because it's a Side of me I hide.. I am VERY insecure, I blame everything on myself even if it's something someone else does. I take things very personally ( not in an I'm stuck up way) personally as in, this is my fault" " I could have helped her or him" " why is he/she so much more talented than me?" " Am I a good enough wife?" " is Heavenly Father going to think I am a failure?" ... Guys ... I worry so much. In case you ever think that I don't literally worry every day about how I can help each person I love you are wrong.
For instance if I spend time with my sister I think .." Oh my gosh I hope my brother didn't feel left out" and then self implode because, " How could I have been so thoughtless?" haha my dad always tells me our guilt machines work really well;) it's both a blessing and a curse I suppose.

I worry so much you guys. However, I only do it because I CARE SO MUCH. So guess what? If you are an acquaintance of mine, you, to me .. Are a friend for life! And my friends for life are my family and I LOVE MY FAMILY. Anyways, sometimes I don't feel like I do a good a good job at any of those things previously stated and then... BOOM, God shows me all the people who are surrounding me who are on my side helping me to accomplish all that I can.

6.I learned this week that I can run a marathon!!! What??? A marathon you say?? Yep. Thank you to ALL of the amazing people who supported and pushed me I did it. Tears are streaming down my face as I type this. I work so hard to NOT be that person that is the "sick girl" Cystic Fibrosis obviously effects me  day in every way but, my goal ever since I was little was to break the stereotype of , " I can't do that I'm sick" .. I always have wanted to prove to people that you can do anything you put your mind to.. And four days ago I just did that. As I crossed the finish line of the St. George marathon, I thought, " this is for all those who say they can't, and for those who literally can't. Cant's can become cans, and attitude is quite literally everything.

7. Last and best of all, today as I gazed through the windows of the airplane There it was, the majestic sky, all of that beauty. It was kind of a metaphor for me of God showing me the beauty in all things. Helping me to realize I in fact AM closer to him than I thought. Another one of the millions of prayers I have said had been answered. By a God who loves me Mindy Marie Catmull. One person on this earth out of the 7 other billion people an infinite amount.

I. Am. loved.

You. Are loved.

Life is beautiful

And we my friends...

Are infinite !

With all my heart I know that if you or I or anyone and everyone out there kneels to pray, they will know this is true. I'm thankful for God today. And guess what? I feel right back

on track. 

Sunday, November 2, 2014

Park City is pretty

Luke and I had the opportunity through one of our friends to get a really good deal on a week at he Marriott Mountainside Resort in Park City. This is where we went for our honeymoon (which we loved), and were thrilled to be able to go back. It was pretty much the perfect vacation just what we needed. It was also incredibly nice that we were so close to home. (In case we needed anything) some may say that's not really a vacation, being closer to home, however having lots of health problems, being close to doctors has its perks. (We ended up coming back a day early to go to my sinus doctor due to a sinus infection that has been building over a month. They had a cancelation so I was blessed enough to get an appointment, and get some medicine. Anyways back to our vacation.... It was so fun. We played a TON of pool (or Billiards if you are a fancy nancy;) . I'm talking like thirty games in the span of six days.. But let's not kid ourselves ... I only won once... ONCE. Let's just say that'd not my forte in life. On one day we went and walked around main street. I'm in LOVE with Main Street. I love the vintage feel of all of the shops and they are so close together. I love places like that. In fact it makes me want to live in a more historic time,when there were more little shops close together, in buildings much like small apartments with creaky stairs and small nooks. We ate at Main Street Pizza and Noodle. It was sooo over priced, but it tasted really good! The actual resort has many activities in and of itself so between sugar cookie decorating, board games, swimming pools, and a full gym we were set. It was just so nice to be in such a beautiful area with the leaves changing, and the cool air. Luke and I mostly just hung out I guess you could say. We didn't do anything super extravagent , and I think that is what made it so nice. Sometimes there is joy in simplicity. Comply spending time with the man I love was more than I could ever ask for. Needless to say spending a week with him and then having him return to work tomorrow is sad to think about... Call me crazy but I am going to miss him ! I love every moment I get to spend with my Lukie babe. On the last day that we were up there (Halloween) Rose, Rich and baby Menlie came up and slept there and hung out with us. On Halloween morning we all went to Kneaders (best breakfast place ever) and had a very nice brunch. Following hat Rose and I put together a scavenger hunt of Halloween things that we could find ( a photo scavemger hunt ) and had one hour to race to see who could get all of the items the fastest. It was sincerely a tie at who won. We loved it.

When we came home on Halloween evening Luke and I were spent. Sooo.... Dont even worry we fell asleep around five and completely ignored any trick or treaters. Mean huh???!! It was purely out of laziness. I would wake up to the door bell ring and then fall right back asleep. So .. Next year I think I owe my neighbors some pretty substantial snackage. Ha! It was a lovely week , and to top it off Luke and I taught our very fist Sunday school lesson in church today . it was wonderful. I love being a member of the LDS faith, I love Park City vacations, and I love my sweet husband!


Thursday, October 30, 2014

Fall Pics ❤

About a month ago I was lucky enough to win a giveaway from one of my favorite photographers Kenzie Dawn Myers. I was thrilled. Not only is she an amazing photographer but she was so fun to work with and kind, and seriously funny. Let's just say the pics did NOT dissapoint . We went up little cottonwood canyon and it was gorgeous seriously I feel like the essence of fall was captured flawlessly.

I love love love my boy, and these pictures.
Thank you so much Kenny.


Wednesday, October 15, 2014

A very Witchy post

 Last Saturday Rose held the annual witches tea. Consisting of hot cocoa, apple cider, excellent treats, and a bunch of witchy women. (The nice kind of course , not the wicked witch of the East Wizard of Oz kind to clarify ;) ) it was super fun to dress up and don my false eyelashes, and witches hat. I just love Halloween and all of the traditions that come with it. Especially the excuse to play dress ups.

Rose and miss Menlie or should I say cookie monster ? She was loving her cookie. 

Which witch is which ??

Cutest Emily (my baby sis) and Emma (my cousin. Laughing at me making them be all Posey.

Thank you to Goodwill, Gardener Village, and some old shoes my witch costume was less than $15 and I loved it !!! 

My mom, sis, and I 

Some of the girlies from our family before the rest arrived. 

Happiest Halloween and dress up season !!
The not so wicked witch of the West

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

fancy pants...I mean hats.

Let's talk hats for a minute. Remember the Audrey Hepburn Judy Garland hi we wear beautiful hats era??? Can we pretty pretty please go back to that time. ? Also can we throw in the whole dress thing. I want am excuse to wear dresses more often. Not that this whole legging trend isn't the best. Thing. Ever. But... I do love me a good dress, and a fancy Nancy hat. Who votes that we go back to the elegance of a good derby hat ??

Judy Garland and Fred Astaire in only on of the best musical masterpieces there ever was.. "Easter Parade. " ( I'm a sucker for the classics.)

Oh..Audrey..simply flawless

Look at this beautiful hat!! Let's start a movement. My hat goes off to all of you in this endeavor to bring back the elegance of these beautiful creations.

The "Mad Hatter"

Monday, October 13, 2014

I title this post slacker...slacking..slacks... snacks.

Guys!! Its been about a million years so I am going to catch you up. You know.. Give you the 411... The know how.. The deets (details) of what's been going on.

The cabin. The most peaceful, woodsy,snow white and the seven dwarfs cabin there is. 

Addysen Sophia doin her baby thing, you know, being cute. Playing with squishy things, crawling around, being the cutest little 1 year old (almost one at the time) there ever was.

Look at the view from the front door. I love the windows. You feel like you are all encompassed in the woods and the beautiful nature God created,yet protected and peaceful in this little cabin in the woods.

Montana my sister in love and I. We Dont care if we have sleepy eyes,rad sweatshirts and bedhead, hanging out near the fire was more worth it than our appearance. 

The dogs. Four.dogs. on dogs. On humans. 

Karacat and I just cheesing it up. As you can see we are all super relaxed. The cabin is such a fun place to hang out, go for a run, relax, take a nap, converse, play horseshoes, and just simply enjoy one another's company without the hassle of modern technology .

The creek. So... You have to hold on to a rope to go down a VERY steep hill to get to the creek. I guess this gives trust fall a whole new meaning. Ha. Shorty after this picture a great water fight involving rocks and large splashing commenced. I think its safe to say... This battle is not over and next year you better watch your backs... You know who you are..

This one is my favorite purely for the humor of it. 
Chloe( my niece): Mindy let's do a puzzle.
Me: okay let's do it on the floor over here.
Chloe: ( helps with two or three pieces and checks in every fifteen or so minutes.while I complete the puzzle by myself.) Guys! Check out the puzzle I made! 

Haha I love her. And the cabin. And my family. Thank goodness we live in such a beautiful state and are blessed enough to have the opportunity to have share such great memories together with our family there.

The puzzle procurer

Thursday, August 7, 2014

Beauty is Not ONLY Skin Deep

This week has been busy adjusting back to normal life, adding a few new nebulized medicines, and other mishaps. There was one night where Luke and I both fell asleep he nearly in tears, and I definitely in tears.

Another trial had come upon us. A small one,semmingly insignificant to so many in the world,but to us ... It was ANOTHER thing. We both decided that the saying "when it rains.... It pours" is true.

It all started with me being hospitalized, and Luke's job. At the company he works at there are only three managers. There must always be one present. Well... The week I was hospitalized, Luke's other co-manager's wife had a baby. He took the week off to be with her, and that made it so Luke was unable to come up and see me for 4 or five of the days. (PS... Totally awesome dad of his coworker to take off and spend with his wife. I am not in any way complaining about that. Just explaining the details. Anyways carrying on...not having him with me all the time was hard. I am always with him. He is my best friend. We kept holding strong though and obviously we got through it, and were Sooo thankful for the times we got to see each other...

Moving right ahead, we get home and Luke had a small medical emergency and then we both were missing our church callings, and felt really bad...

So... Wednesday morning we woke up, and said our prayers and again were strengthened by a loving God. Although we have been stressed out of our minds, we still are so thankful because the blessings we recieve , completely out weigh the trials.

I titled this beauty is not just skin deep because the facts are these: what makes you beautiful is your strength. The strength to overcome all weakness,self doubt, fear, etc. What makes you beautiful is your background. What you have fought through to get where you are. What makes you beautiful is the service you render with each giving day.

Its not about how skinny you are, or how cute your hair is, or how wealthy you are. Really??? Do you think that at the end of this life God is going to judge you on your outward appearance?! I say this because today I felt so beautiful and lucky because I got to get my hair colored, and a manicure and pedixure. Thanks to my lovely neighbor polish and pipsqueaks and my loving husband. I felt so pretty for the first time in a while. I put on make up and a cute outfit and even had my mom snap a picture and thought..... Behind that smile is not only lipstick, mascara, and a cute bow... Its me. Mindy Marie Catmull.

I am beautiful because I have overcome hard things, and have learned from them. The beauty from my life comes from not only the good memories,but the bad as well.

What makes you the most beautiful ?! Inside and out ?!